Common rhetoric has encouraged women to stay home, take care
of the kids, and be a dutiful housewife. Women everywhere are rising up to say,
“That’s not necessarily what I want.” Women everywhere are empowering each
other to pursue their career goals, to own their sexuality, and to not give a
damn. Great! Awesome! Wonderful! Power to the people!
But we have to be careful not to go too far. Just as I don’t
want young girls to feel embarrassed for liking science or math, I don’t want
young girls to feel embarrassed for wanting to be a stay-at-home mom. If
feminism means the support of women breaking typical gender norms it also means
the support of women who don’t want to “break the mold”. It’s okay not to want
marriage or kids. It’s okay to want to stay home and take care of the family. I
have a friend who just wants to be a housewife. While I don’t necessarily think
she’s making the best decision, so what? Who am I to impose my beliefs on her?
I’m not going to discourage her from going after what she really wants. If I
did, I couldn’t call myself a feminist.
We have to stop adopting broad terms for short-range
interpretations. Feminism is the empowerment of all people. It means we
celebrate people who have a lot of sex and we celebrate people who are
abstinent. We celebrate people who pursue a career over family and we celebrate
people who pursue family over a career. We celebrate people who do both, and we
don’t act shocked when they pull it off.
We don’t slut-shame. We don’t Mom-shame. We don’t shame.
If you’re claiming to fight for equality but shut down when
someone else’s sense of self interferes with what you’ve decided the norm
should be, you’re missing your own point.
So leave Megan Trainor out of it, all you critics calling her out for "Dear Future Husband". You don’t have to agree
with everything she says. I don’t. But I’m also not going to censor her right
to express herself. I choose to listen to other music that I find more
empowering, but I will not take away something that speaks to someone else.
This is what feminism looks like:
Get on board.
